I have not been reading my Bible or even praying of late. I guess, in some ways, I’ve been depressed. Coupled with the fact that I’ve been ill, I just did not feel like talking to God. I don’t think I was mad at Him, just tired of it all. Then today, I got out of bed and decided to do some cleaning while listening to the Word. Even though I’m several days behind, I still went to the last podcast I’d heard and it was the story of the children of Israel in the wilderness. After listening to that, I went back to read it. I’ll post some verses here, but bear in mind that this took place directly after God had parted the red sea for them to cross and had made that same red sea swallow up the Egyptian chariots.
Exodus 16:1-12
1-3 On the fifteenth day of the second month after they had left Egypt, the whole company of Israel moved on from Elim to the Wilderness of Sin which is between Elim and Sinai. The whole company of Israel complained against Moses and Aaron there in the wilderness. The Israelites said, “Why didn’t God let us die in comfort in Egypt where we had lamb stew and all the bread we could eat? You’ve brought us out into this wilderness to starve us to death, the whole company of Israel!”
4-5 God said to Moses, “I’m going to rain bread down from the skies for you. The people will go out and gather each day’s ration. I’m going to test them to see if they’ll live according to my Teaching or not. On the sixth day, when they prepare what they have gathered, it will turn out to be twice as much as their daily ration.”
6-7 Moses and Aaron told the People of Israel, “This evening you will know that it is God who brought you out of Egypt; and in the morning you will see the Glory of God. Yes, he’s listened to your complaints against him. You haven’t been complaining against us, you know, but against God.”
8 Moses said, “Since it will be God who gives you meat for your meal in the evening and your fill of bread in the morning, it’s God who will have listened to your complaints against him. Who are we in all this? You haven’t been complaining to us—you’ve been complaining to God!”
9 Moses instructed Aaron: “Tell the whole company of Israel: ‘Come near to God. He’s heard your complaints.'”
10 When Aaron gave out the instructions to the whole company of Israel, they turned to face the wilderness. And there it was: the Glory of God visible in the Cloud.
11-12 God spoke to Moses, “I’ve listened to the complaints of the Israelites. Now tell them: ‘At dusk you will eat meat and at dawn you’ll eat your fill of bread; and you’ll realize that I am God, your God.'” (Exodus 16:1-12, The Message)
I mean gosh! What was it with these people!!! They had the opportunity to literally experience the Glory of God and each time they faced one small discomfort they began to moan and complain!! What sort of people were these?
As I was busy ruminating on that, a soft voice in my heart replied the sort of people you are.
This brought me up short and really made me think. I have actually seen and experienced God doing wonderful things in my life; He has brought me out of some situations that I could only have gotten out of through His help. Regardless of how hard I’ve tried, He keeps me from destroying my own life. . . the examples are numerous and countless. The things He has brought me through: exams, illness, heartache. . . and yet here I was, because of a little loneliness and depression, I turned my face to the wall and was sulking!
It was a lesson that rammed home. Communication and fellowship with God does not depend on how I’m feeling at the
moment. Happy, sad, down, exhilarated, whatever – He wants to share in my life. In every tiny little detail. Just to talk and fellowship and feel that connection.
I guess when it comes down to it, we are not that much different from those Israelites. No matter how many times God has shown us his mercy, we still find it easy to go into a sulk because things don’t go our way. We need to know that God’s love does not change with circumstances or the weather. We need to trust that He is the most Constant in our lives. Ever. Things may change, circumstances may change, we may even change. But his love for us will never, ever change.
For Jesus doesn’t change—yesterday, today, tomorrow, he’s always totally himself. (Hebrews 13:8, The Message)
the reservoir 
Girl..those have been my thots too lately..i have been so ungrateful, i keep complaining about everything…Inspite of the fact that God has blessed me with an amazing husband, a beautiful daughter and a wonderful job, i still complain..about traffic, no househelp, not getting enough sleep cos i have to do the house chores and baby still wakes up in the middle of the night..i really don’t know when i became like this.. i mean just after having the baby He took me from a job that made me get home at 9pm to a job that allows me get home at 6.30pm, staff bus, free lunch, lighter workload, more pay…
i just thot about the Isrealites recently and realised i’m just like them cos God has been tooooo good to me..i feel worse cos my husband is so patient and loves me inspite of my terrible attitude
ányway, i’m grateful for second chances, i went back to God and i also realised that i became like this cos i stopped spending time with God..had a beautiful time in his presence this morning and i’m ready to start over..
its so amazing that He’s a loving father and he takes us back each time…His mercies truly endure forever
God is faithful girl, and somehow (as crazy as it seems), he understands us and loves us regardless. It is always a delight to get insight from Him and he never gets tired of given us second chances. And third. And fourth. Ad infinitum.
Hi, i know you wrote that few years ago. I was searching on google something on that subject , someting or someone i can relate because i feel alone in my situation. I love god and i’ve experienced his wonderful things in my life to but for sometimes its been hard having a relationship and pray to him. Prayer feels like a chore, something i have to do not something i get to do, and when i do pray i feel like an hypocrite before god. I talk to him all day long but dont always sit down and spent time with him quietly, when i do stop to spend time with him i always hurry up so i can be done and do something else and again i feel the guilt and condemnation and its a very heavy burden 😦 and i feel god hates me because of all that. I dont know what to do with all that , the minute i wake up in the morning i say to myself ‘ oh no today i have to pray and read my bible or god is not going to bless me or is going to be mad at me. I know we are not saved by our works, i know that , but how can i have balance and peace ?
Hello Caroline, I apologise for just replying your comment. I have thought a lot about what you’ve written and I know exactly how you feel. Sometimes when we pray, it’s almost as though our prayers are bouncing back the roof and not going anywhere. I have been there.
There are a few reasons why you might be feeling the way you do:
1. You have never actually accepted Jesus into your life. Many of us grew up in Christian homes and we’ve gone through the rituals…going to Church, praying, reading the Bible…everything, but we do not really have a personal connection with the Lord. If that is where you are, you need to honestly search your heart and decide if you want to follow HIM with all you’ve got. Then ask for forgiveness and ask Jesus into your life. Acknowledge that HE is Lord over everything – even your feelings and ambitions.
2. You might have given your life to him, but there is some sin lurking around somewhere. You need to pray like David did, and ask God to search you and show you any hidden sin. Then confess it (or any you can remember) and ask the Lord to forgive you. Ask for his mercy and ask the blood of Jesus to wash you clean.
3. You might be overwhelmed by circumstances. Sometimes life just gets to us and although the love of God is constant, we just don’t seem to feel it anymore. Go on google.com and search for bible verses about God’s love…verses like 1 John 4:7-8
The devil loves to whisper lies in our ears and tell us that God hates us. Remember this…he sent his ONLY son to die for you when you didn’t even care about who he was and when you hated him. He did not wait for you to pray or talk to him before he sent Jesus. He sent him anyway. Before you were born, HE loved you. He knew how you would turn out, and he still loved you.
You don’t have to pray or read your Bible for HIM to love you-his love is constant. It never stops, it never fails. It does not ever drop by one inch. It just is. You pray because you want to let him know what you are going through, because you need his help and advice, because you just want to feel closer to him. NOTE: this is you. Prayer is not for his benefit, it is for yours.
You read your bible to learn what his plan is for your life and how to handle life’s situations. Once again, it isn’t for his benefit, but for yours.
So climb on your bed or your favourite chair and ask him to wrap his arms around you and blanket you with his love. His UNCONDITIONAL love. Tell him honestly how you feel and that you do not really enjoy praying or reading the Bible (he doesn’t mind hearing that, trust me) and just ask for help. He will take it from there.
I think I’ll stop here now. I love you and will say a prayer for you.
Your sister,
Sharon
P.S. If you don’t mind, I’ll probably turn this into a blog post. I hope you don’t mind. 🙂