When God Seems So Far

Living with a baby is an adventure. Like every adventure, it is fraught with uncertainty, fear, sleepless nights and incredible moments. We never know just what to expect. Though, expecting something different each day seems to work for us.

As she grows everyday though, I begin to see myself unravel in her. I am not talking about the physical similarities or even the character traits (not like those are very visible right now). I am speaking more about my relationship with God. I know, it is funny. But if you study a child closely, I bet you will see the way you relate to God reflected back at you.

A good example. Before she began responding to sound, she drew comfort from our presence (mine and her dad’s). But the only way she could know we were there was if she saw us. Sometimes, she would turn her head towards another direction, away from us. Of course, when she did that, she was not able to see us anymore. Then the wailing began. She would cry and cry.

Her dad and I would be sitting just next to her trying to get her attention but she was so fixed on where she was facing, she could not see us. Once I told her, Sweetheart I am here, right beside you. Why won’t you just turn and look at me? But she just got more distressed.

Once I got really frustrated with her and then deep in my heart I heard “that is so you.” That pulled me up short. I cannot even count the number of times I would fall into depression because I could not see God. It happens all the time. I would feel lonely and abandoned or something happens, which for the life of me, I cannot see God’s hand in and then I get distressed.

I am sure it is a situation we are all familiar with. A loved one hurts, betrays us. Career, on the fast track to nowhere. Marriage…God, let’s not even go there! Sound familiar? Then we begin to wail and ask God “Where are you? How could you let this happen?

Could it be that He is there, the whole time but we are the ones facing the wrong direction? Psalm 121:1&2 says:

“I lift up my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth”

Which leads me to the question: Where are you looking?

Many times, we are so busy facing one direction; feeling sorry for ourselves that we forget to look to where we should be facing in the first place. UP. God is right there calling you by name, telling you I AM RIGHT HERE. JUST TURN AND LOOK.

You do not have to see Him but He is there. He is with you. Anytime you start to feel alone make a conscious decision to remind yourself that God is there. His name is Immanuel: God with us.

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