“Behold you are handsome, my beloved! Yes, pleasant!…” Song of Solomon 1:16a
We all crave appreciation. We want to know that we are valued and loved. Early love letters probably reflected our admiration, but if we’re not careful, our spouse will forget why we were drawn to him. If you still have any of your old love letters, re-read them for clues to deepen your current level of appreciation for your spouse.
When we spend time criticizing our husbands, we lose time that could be spent admiring them. As you consider various ways to encourage your husband, ask, “How can I admire him?”
Does your husband know that you think he is attractive? What was one of the characteristics in your husband that first drew you to him? Was it a physical characteristic, or something else?
Was it his gentle, compassionate eyes? Kindness or concern for others? An easy-going confidence? A steadiness that comes from trusting in the Lord? Strength of character in a culture that lacks integrity? Do you see at least a glimpse of that characteristic in him today? Whatever it is, tell him!
My fiance affectionately complains about the fact that I think everyone is pretty or good looking. It gets really exasperating for him. But there’s nothing I can or will do about it; I truly do find most people good looking. It could be their eyes, or the beautiful 100 watt smile, or even the way they laugh; I always maintain that if you really look, you will find something lovely about a person.
For my fiance, it was the compassion and gentle sensitivity in his eyes that drew me. He had this outward facade of the big, bad, tough boy but his eyes gave him away and that really intrigued me. Oh he is handsome and I’m not being biased! But that was not enough for me…there had to be something extra. His sense of humour and especially his sense of mischief drew me in – I can’t resist mischief. Truly.
I have been careful to let him know the many things that draw me to him. A question he keeps asking is why I love him. He rarely gets the same answer twice because there are just so many reasons and yet no one reason. So each time he asks, I have something new to tell him. I guess that can be called worship hmm?
I checked it up on thefreedictionary.com and this was one meaning I got: Worship – To regard with ardent or adoring esteem or devotion.
That is easy to do with someone you love, I definitely regard my sweetheart with ardent AND adoring esteem AND devotion. So if you find it easy to give such devotion to mere mortals, what of God? The one who loves you more than a thousand men (or women) put together, who are head over heels in love with you? It’s sad how we take Him for granted day in day out. . . just writing this I’m feeling really ashamed of myself. When last did I tell my Heavenly Father just what it is that I admire about Him? Have I tried to deepen my appreciation of Him? These are things I’m going to think about now and consider how to worship better.
Yesterday, I wrote about encouraging through listening. I had to repeat the encouragement challenge and it was well worth it. Still wasn’t easy though; many times I had to scold myself with ‘Girl, just shut up!‘ Hectic.
I don’t know how well I did with the listening but if I were to score myself, I’d give myself a 5 (guess that’s why we are not usually allowed to score ourselves).