I often find myself gripped by the green eyed monster, a.k.a envy. My acquaintance with envy started as far back as I can remember…………. I am the only girl in a family with 3 children. And I wanted to be a boy. I wanted to be a boy soooo bad! It took me awhile to realise that it didn’t matter how much faster I ran, or how high up a tree I climbed; and woe upon woe, it didn’t even matter if I climbed all the rocks and mountains around my home or if I could skid a pebble over water better than my brothers…I would ALWAYS be a girl! You can imagine the shock. So I began to envy my brothers because they were boys – even though there was hardly anything they did that I could not do I even played football (that’s soccer to my American friends, lol).
Of course it did not end there. I got envious over this or that, many times totally irrelevant things like my best friend’s straight legs or my other best friend’s energy. I was blessed however because I did not get consumed by envy. I had received good instruction from my mum.
I’m writing this because my fiancee and I talked about it a few days ago…how some people could get really consumed with envy. Envy is bad, no doubt about it. But I don’t believe there are many people who go through life without feeling a tiny bit of the green streak (if you have do please let me know how you do it!).
Ok, so we all get envious every now and then…what about it? I think the major issue is not the envy per se, but how we choose to deal with it. I mean really, no one is perfect, the grass is always greener at the other side of the fence …so on and so on but there are 3 ways most people handle envy:
- Pretend they’re not envious at all;
- Admit they are envious and stew in it;
- Admit they are envious and ask for help.
I prefer the 3rd option. Matter of fact that is what I use. I run to God and start mumbling. Lord its happening again; I’m jealous cos she has this and I don’t. Help me realise that what I have is just perfect for me. Please, please, please, i don’t wanna be envious – I really don’t! But I can’t help the way I’m feeling…
It’s no joke. I don’t beat around the bush with this. Other stuff I might get into denial about but not envy. It could give birth to so many possible disasters that I don’t even want to imagine it incubating inside of me. But that’s just me. I’m almost entirely dependent when it comes to handling my negative feelings.