Yesterday I watched this film about a girl who became an unrepentant prostitute. She was a prostitute or “ashawo” as we call it here in Nigeria but was resolutely unapologetic. This particular young man took interest in her and tried to get her to turn form her ways but his appeal made no difference to her.
As I watched I tried to discern the rationale behind her chosen profession. It obviously was not solely for the money; she was young and had no aversion to hard work. So what could have caused it. What bothered me most was not even the fact that she was indiscriminate about who she had sex with, once she got paid. What really disturbed me was this hardness about her. She did not want to hear about God or a better way of life. She did not want to hear anything at all. When the gospel is preached, there are a myriad reactions. Not everyone is receptive, but at least they react; even if it is to laugh in disdain. She was completely indifferent.
Later on, as the film progressed, i discovered that she had been continuously raped and abused by her father who was a pastor! How was anybody going to convince her that there was a good God out there who cared about her? All of a sudden, her antipathy and hardness of heart made sense. She had suffered so many hurts that to arm herself against further hurts she made herself stop feeling. She had buried the pain so deep, she could not feel it anymore. In order to begin to feel once more, she had to dig up those hurts and examine them. Give them a chance to heal.
A lot of us have gone through one experience or the other that have left scars. we have pains we have buried deep inside that we cannot even remember they exist anymore. But the subconscious remembers and that is why we act the way we do.
We all want to love and be loved, to live a normal and well balanced life. But somehow we find that we are never able to get there. The mind can be funny like that. If there are hurts that have refused to heal, or pains buried deep down, they block the way for the spring of love to well up. It could be anything: childhood abuse; rape; a broken home; a broken marriage; you name it, if we have not allowed LOVE to heal them then it will be impossible to experience love.
Psychologists and Shrinks have said to look deep inside self for the strength to go on. Well, what happens when we dig into the reservoirs of self and come back empty? The Lord Jesus says “Come unto me all you who labour…and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28 NKJV). The hurt might be decades old and it might seem like its too far gone to heal. But He made us, surely he knows how to fix us. Until that pain is dug out, the love certainly can’t spring out.
Read the article Cure for a Broken Heart by Wilma Watson to get practical steps on letting God heal the hurts.